Monday, 27 May 2013

Joanie Loves Unmann-Wittering



I had a dream the other night in which, amongst ever things, I appeared to be married to Joan Rhodes. Joan was a wrestler, actress, stunt woman and muscle lady, an 'iron girl in a velvet glove' who could tear telephone books in half, bend iron bars with her pearly whites and lift up two fat blokes without getting a single wrinkle in her foundation. The above picture was taken in 1958, and perhaps gives a flavour of what life with Joan might have been like. Tidy.

Just don't get on her nerves, that's all.




Here she is looking very glam and singing a song which will link into a short film about the correct way to lift and carry heavy objects. There are numerous shots of her pulsating inner thighs. I love the Doctor at the end, he's the most self-conscious man I've ever seen, he looks like a stunned carp.





I have written a poem to this great, late (she died in 2010) Amazonian lady.

O Joan - 
heavy lifter,
sofa shifter
now that you have taught me
that the heart is a muscle, too
please don't throw me over 
I beg of you.

At least it was short.


5 comments:

  1. The video is 'private'. =/

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  2. Love Mr Cholmondley-Warner at the end.

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  3. For me it's Joan's cut-glass accent (if that is her real voice?) that makes her so fascinating.

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  4. Joan was born into extreme poverty in the east end, so she might be putting it on a bit.

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