Wednesday, 29 June 2011

Blue Blood

Oliver Reed! Man mountain! Garantuan acting colossus! When he’s on top form he’s one of the very best English actors ever ever ever in the history of anything ever. When he’s not, he doesn’t so much chew scenery as swallow the sets whole and burp in your face. In this film, Blue Blood we get the latter Ollie. You can’t take your eyes off him. Mainly because you’re terrified that if you do, he’ll turn up in your living room shout at you, eat your cat and throw your sofa out the window.

Ollie plays an evil butler who takes over the possessions of his degenerate master (a very young Derek Jacobi) by means of witchcraft. That doesn’t sound too bad does it? Well, I’m sorry readers, it is. It’s just bloody awful. One teeny tiny redeeming feature is the beautiful Fiona Lewis who has a couple of sex scenes. Though sadly they’re with Derek, who is many, many things but sexy?


The whole thing was filmed on location at Longleat House. The country seat of the Marquis of Bath, who co-wrote the script under the name Alexander Thynne for some reason, probably because he’s an idiot.


  1. This film is amazing, and has long been a favourite of mine. Excellent slow-motion footage of Jacobi and friends out of their minds on whiskey, and Reed's bizarre accent is worth the Longleat admission price alone.
    Bad acid and witchery in a delightful setting.

    To describe it as
    "bloody awful" is just.. well, bloody awful !

  2. Just spent £1.99 on this piece of crap / forgotten gem. Can't wait!